#36: How Do You Decide When Nothing Is Certain?

☀️ The Fridge Door Dilemma

You're standing in front of the open fridge, staring at ingredients, trying to figure out what to make for dinner. It's a small decision. Meaningless, really. 

However, somehow, it feels heavy. Maybe it's because you've already made a hundred other choices today: what to wear, which email to answer first, whether to speak up in that meeting, if you should accept that new job offer or stay at your current job. 

Here's the thing about decisions: they don't exist in isolation. Every choice you make, from the trivial (ordering at a restaurant) to the life-altering (accepting a new job, ending a relationship), happens against a backdrop of uncertainty. You can't see the future. You don't have all the information. And yet, you're expected to choose anyway.

The uncomfortable truth is that most decisions aren't about having the right answer. They're about navigating the gap between what you know and what you can't predict. 

Some people freeze in that gap, while others rush through it, choosing quickly just to escape the discomfort. And a few learn to sit with the uncertainty long enough to make a choice they can live with, even when they can't be sure it's the right one.

This edition is an exploration of that gap.

📖 3 Articles to Spark Your Curiosity

1. How to Respond to Annoying Things with Greater Ease
   Evidence-based skills from acceptance and commitment therapy that teach you to distinguish between unavoidable pain (daily hassles) and avoidable pain (your reaction to them). The guide explores how to recognize your "tender times" and practice self-compassion when life's minor frictions inevitably arrive.
   → Read on Psyche
   

2. Great Leaders Empower Strategic Decision-Making Across the Organization
   The individualistic traits that fuel early career success (solving problems through personal effort, making rapid instinct-based decisions) often become liabilities in complex environments. Leaders must transition from "hero" to "architect," building systems that enable everyone to make better strategic choices.
   → Read on Harvard Business Review
   

3. Your Optimism Is Killing Your Business (And So Is Your Pessimism)
   Intel survived by embracing "paradoxical thinking," a method that forces leaders to hold competing truths simultaneously. Neither pure optimism nor pure pessimism serves you in high-stakes environments; the real skill is knowing when to apply each mindset to the same problem.
   → Read on Radical Briefing

🗞️ 3 Headlines Worth Exploring

1. Google Launches AI Image Verification in Gemini App
   You can now upload any image to Gemini and ask if it was created with Google AI. The app checks for SynthID watermarks (invisible signals embedded in over 20 billion AI-generated images since 2023) and provides context about the image's origin. The feature currently only detects Google-made content, but C2PA metadata support is coming soon.
   → Read on Google Blog
   

2. The 2025 Resy Retrospective: Dining Is More Connected Than Ever
   This year's dining trends centered on connection: shared plates, communal tables, and the rise of the "table captain" (the friend who confidently orders for the group). Gen Z led the charge with 90% enjoying communal dining, and restaurants embraced earlier reservations, with more people dining between 5 p.m. and 7 p.m. than ever before.
   → Read on Resy

3. The 100 Life Decisions People Dread Most, According to Psychologists
   Researchers surveyed over 4,380 people to map the risky choices that cause the most stress. Career decisions topped the list, with younger adults dreading quitting a job and older adults fearing accepting a new one. Surprisingly, these worries remained stable even through the COVID-19 pandemic, revealing consistent patterns in what keeps us up at night.
   → Read on Popular Science

☀️ 3 Actions to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

1. Make one decision without asking for advice
   Pick a small but real choice you've been putting off (what to order at dinner, which book to read next, how to spend Saturday afternoon). Decide on your own, without polling friends, checking reviews, or seeking consensus. Notice what it feels like to trust your own judgment, even when you can't be certain it's the "right" answer.

2. Practice the "Pause Before Reacting" rule
   The next time something annoys you (a curt email, someone cutting in line, a friend forgetting to answer your messages), wait 90 seconds before responding. Breathe. Name the feeling. Then choose your response deliberately instead of reacting automatically to build the muscle of sitting with discomfort before deciding what to do about it.

3. Volunteer to be the table captain
   At your next group meal, take charge of ordering for everyone. Ask about dietary restrictions, suggest dishes to share, and make decisions confidently. If you're someone who usually defers to others, this is your chance to practice decisive action in a low-stakes environment. If you're already the table captain, try the opposite: let someone else lead and practice trusting their choices.

⚡ 6 Quick Resources

📚 To add to your "to read" list: Barnes & Noble's Best Books of 2025
A curated list of the year's standout reads, from literary fiction to compelling nonfiction, helping you decide what deserves a spot on your nightstand.
→ Read on Reader's Digest

🗺️ To save for future travels: Time Out's Coolest Streets in the World 2025
The most vibrant, culturally rich streets across the globe, from neighborhood markets to artistic hubs where locals actually live and gather.
→ Read on Time Out

👜 To read: A Unified Theory of the Handbag
Audrey Wollen explores how the handbag shaped human evolution as the original "carrier bag," reframing feminized labor and dependency as generative rather than limiting.
→ Read on Yale Review

💰 To check: How Optimism Can Boost Your Savings
Research from the American Psychological Association shows that optimistic people save more money and make better long-term financial decisions, even when controlling for income and education.
→ Read on APA

🕵️ To know: The Original Ponzi Scheme
The fascinating history of Charles Ponzi's 1920s fraud that gave its name to all pyramid schemes, complete with original documents and investigative records.
→ Read on Postal Museum

🎥 To watch: The Future Will Be Shaped by Optimists
Editor and author Kevin Kelly argues that we have a moral obligation to be optimistic. He shares three reasons for maintaining a positive outlook during challenging times and how it helps us become better ancestors.
→ Watch on YouTube

🎲 This week’s wonderfully random corner of the internet 

🗺️ MapGenie

An interactive map collection for video game fans. Whether you're hunting down every Korok seed in Zelda, tracking all the collectibles in Elden Ring, or mapping escape routes in Tarkov, you’ll find them all on MapGenie!

→ Explore your gaming worlds at mapgenie.io

📝 Word of the Week

Tariki (Japanese/Buddhist) - "Other-power"; the practice of relying on external forces or grace rather than one's own strength or willpower (jiriki, or "self-power").

In Pure Land Buddhism, tariki describes the acceptance that some things are beyond our control, that we cannot achieve everything through effort alone. It's the counterbalance to our modern obsession with personal agency and optimization. When you're standing at a crossroads, unable to see which path leads where, tariki is the quiet acknowledgment that you cannot control the outcome, only the intention behind your choice.

🧘‍♀️ Question of the Week for Introspection

Think of a decision you've been avoiding or overthinking. What would change if you accepted that you'll never have complete certainty about the outcome? Is the hesitation protecting you from making a mistake, or is it protecting you from having to live with whatever you choose?

See you next Sunday! Until then, keep your eyes open, your questions big, and your sense of wonder alive.

Your curious internet friend,
Ruxandra