#39: What Are You Holding Onto That's Holding You Back?

☀️  The weight of what we keep

You're about to start something new. A project. A habit. A life change. But before you begin, you stop and think about everything else you're already carrying: the commitments you made, the goals you set, the versions of yourself you promised to maintain.

The (quite uncomfortable) truth is that sometimes the reason you can't move forward isn't that you lack discipline or motivation, but that you're holding onto too much from before.

Sure, your brain can hold 2.5 petabytes of information (the equivalent of 8.5 years of continuous HD video). But it doesn't work like a computer hard drive. Your brain prioritizes and prunes, so it’s designed from the start to forget.

And I feel we’ve been collectively looking down at the idea of forgetting. Why does it have to be a negative signal that we’re just making space and letting our brain breathe? 

If you try to remember everything, you’ll end up truly knowing nothing. It’s an interesting and maybe hard to accept paradox: the more you hold onto, the less you actually have.

This edition is about recognizing what no longer serves you and having the courage to let it go. It's about understanding that learning faster sometimes means forgetting more deliberately, that wisdom isn't accumulation but selective release, and that freedom comes from deciding what deserves to stay.

📖 3 Articles to Spark Your Curiosity

1. What Spinoza Can Teach Us About Living a Great Life
   The 17th-century philosopher was excommunicated for arguing that freedom comes from accepting the limits of our power and releasing false beliefs. Why do we still exhaust ourselves trying to control what we can't?
   → Read on Big Think
   

2. Digital Human Memory
   We're building systems to capture every moment: photos, locations, biometric data, every tap and swipe. But when you outsource memory to technology, what happens to the human ability to remember?
   → Read on Byline
   

3. What If Learning Faster Just Meant Making Mistakes Cheaper?
   An art teacher noticed that students with pencils experimented more freely than those with pens. What if forgetting and relearning beats trying to maintain everything you once knew?
   → Read on Radical Briefing

🗞️ 3 Headlines Worth Exploring

1. Why Starting a Habit on a Wednesday Makes You More Likely to Stick With It
   Starting habits midweek removes the pressure of Monday perfection and lets you tap into the week's natural momentum. Therapists say Wednesdays feel like an experiment rather than a commitment, offering quick wins before the weekend arrives.
   → Read on Real Simple
   

2. From FunHaus to Glitchy Glam: The 2026 Trends Brands Should Watch
   Pinterest's report reveals 55% of consumers say comfort is their main emotional need, and 42% only engage with trends that reflect their personality. Could it be that people are starting to let go of performative aesthetics and embracing imperfection?
   → Read on AdWeek
   

3. U.S. to Inspect Tourists' Social Media History from Past 5 Years
   The U.S. is proposing mandatory disclosure of five years of social media history for visitors from 42 visa-waiver countries. Five years of posts, likes, comments: context collapsed into evidence.
   → Read on CNBC

☀️ 3 Actions to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

1. Conduct a "What Am I Maintaining?" Audit
   Take 10 minutes and list everything you're actively trying to maintain: skills, habits, identities, relationships, resolutions. Then ask yourself: which of these still serve who you're becoming? Circle three things you could release this week.
   

2. Practice Intentional Forgetting
   Choose one piece of information you've been holding onto "just in case." A phone number you've memorized, a fact you cling to, an old grudge, a narrative about who you used to be. Deliberately let it go. Write it down if you need the safety net, then stop rehearsing it in your mind.
   

3. The Pencil Challenge: Create Without Perfection
   Spend 30 minutes on a creative project where you can erase or iterate. Use a pencil. Use a draft document. Use ingredients you can adjust. The goal is simply to train yourself to experiment freely (mistakes are cheap).

⚡ 6 Quick Resources

 🎯 To watch before starting your new year resolution list: How to Set Goals You'll Actually Accomplish
Chuck Wachendorfer challenges the myth that setting goals equals achieving them. Most people fail because they never honestly assessed what they'd need to let go of first.
→ Watch on YouTube

📜 To add to your fun facts collection: Where Did the New Year's Resolution Come From?
We've been making (and breaking) New Year's resolutions for 4,000 years. The ancient Babylonians promised their gods they'd return borrowed objects and pay their debts.
→ Read on The Conversation

☕ To get inspired: Anna Possi: Six Decades Behind the Counter at Italy's Bar Centrale
Anna Possi has worked at the same Italian bar for 60 years. A reminder that sometimes holding on is the point, when you've consciously chosen what deserves your consistency.
→ Read on Reuters

✈️ To plan: Seven Travel Trends That Will Define 2026
Travelers are letting go of the checklist mentality. 2026 trends point toward slower travel, deeper immersion, and fewer but more meaningful destinations.
→ Read on BBC Travel

📱 To read: The Last Days of Social Media
Social media platforms are fading with a slow exodus. What's replacing it? Smaller communities, private channels, and more face-to-face connections (finally).
→ Read on Noema Magazine

🌊 To watch: The Mexican Cliff Divers Who Take Dazzling Leaps Into the Unknown
Every day in Acapulco, cliff divers plunge 35 meters into the ocean below. No safety net or second-guessing. Just the moment of release.
→ Watch on Aeon

🎲 This week’s wonderfully random corner of the internet 

🪟 Johari Window

A classic psychological tool that reveals what you know about yourself, what others see in you, and what remains hidden. Pick adjectives that describe you, then share the link with friends to discover your blind spots.

→ Explore your blind spots at johari.com

📝 Word of the Week

Apophasis (Greek) - The rhetorical practice of mentioning something by saying you will not mention it; bringing attention to something by claiming to pass over it.

Think of it as the language version of holding onto something while pretending to let it go. "I won't mention how you forgot my birthday" (while absolutely mentioning it). Apophasis reveals a truth about human nature: we struggle to truly release what we claim we've moved past. Real letting go happens in silence, not in the performance of release. If you find yourself repeatedly saying you're "over it," you're probably not.

🧘‍♀️ Question of the Week for Introspection

What belief, habit, identity, or piece of knowledge are you holding onto, maybe because letting go would mean admitting you were wrong, wasted time, or are no longer the person you used to be?

See you next Sunday! Until then, keep your eyes open, your questions big, and your sense of wonder alive.

Your curious internet friend,
Ruxandra